confession

i never really kept up with a diary. this may surprise you. it's true. i'm not good on these day-to-day meditations until something big happens that's easy for other people to not see. like, for instance, me leaving again. i guess it's a big deal to me because it feels like i'm going to an entirely different world and i become an entirely different person. i get my own room [[sorta]], my own friends, my own schedule, my own everything. it sounds nice -- everybody craves some sort of independance. but while some people usually see how far they've gotten, i look at how far I have to go yet.

i don't think i'm okay with where i'm at in my life. that's all right =J it makes me that more persistant to change what i don't like and cling to what I do. no time reminds me so much of reality than when it's time to leave home.

i mean, i've left before and i'll come back. then i'll leave again. part of me will always want to go home... and i think that's a good thing.